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    The Bitter-Sweet Second Baby

    May 11, 2021December 2, 2021by StephLeave a Comment on The Bitter-Sweet Second Baby
    Continue Reading The Bitter-Sweet Second Baby
  • Shoe Challenge, Style

    Introducing the 2021 Shoe Challenge!

    January 26, 2021February 8, 2021by Steph6 Comments on Introducing the 2021 Shoe Challenge!
    Continue Reading Introducing the 2021 Shoe Challenge!
  • Diary, Motherhood

    A Letter To Bailey…

    August 19, 2020November 8, 2020by StephLeave a Comment on A Letter To Bailey…
    Continue Reading A Letter To Bailey…
  • Diary, Food & Drink, Thoughts

    Pubs – A Love Letter

    March 21, 2020July 29, 2020by Steph6 Comments on Pubs – A Love Letter
    Continue Reading Pubs – A Love Letter
  • Style

    Winter Fashion Problems

    February 15, 2018November 17, 2021by Steph2 Comments on Winter Fashion Problems
    Continue Reading Winter Fashion Problems
  • Food & Drink

    Recipe – Orange Spiced Gingerbread

    January 28, 2018December 2, 2021by Steph7 Comments on Recipe – Orange Spiced Gingerbread
    Continue Reading Recipe – Orange Spiced Gingerbread
Style

My Winter 2021 Thrift List

December 2, 2021December 2, 2021by StephLeave a Comment on My Winter 2021 Thrift List
My Winter 2021 Thrift List

This week I've been valiantly trying to distract myself from all the festive sequins by compiling a list of my most needed (ok, wanted) pieces...

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Diary, Motherhood

Twins – The Third Trimester

November 14, 2021November 17, 2021by Steph2 Comments on Twins – The Third Trimester
Twins – The Third Trimester

Reflecting on the final stretch…

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Diary, Motherhood, Thoughts

We Aren’t Here For You…

October 5, 2021October 5, 2021by StephLeave a Comment on We Aren’t Here For You…
We Aren’t Here For You…

An open letter to the men who came close to breaking me this week... WARNING: Describes some disturbing content!

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Shoe Challenge, Style

August Shoe Save Round Up

September 20, 2021September 20, 2021by StephLeave a Comment on August Shoe Save Round Up
August Shoe Save Round Up

The last of the Summer shoes...

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Audrey Hepburn:

“PICK THE DAY. ENJOY IT - TO THE HILT. THE DAY AS IT COMES. PEOPLE AS THEY COME..."

Recent Posts

  • My Winter 2021 Thrift List December 2, 2021
  • Twins – The Third Trimester November 14, 2021
  • We Aren’t Here For You… October 5, 2021
  • August Shoe Save Round Up September 20, 2021
  • Twins – The Second Trimester September 15, 2021
  • And Then You Turned Two… August 19, 2021
  • July Shoe Save Round Up August 9, 2021
  • Life Lessons – Knowing When to Quit August 4, 2021
  • Why We Won’t Be Finding Out the Genders of Our Babies July 21, 2021
  • Breaking Up With Fast Fashion July 16, 2021

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Just to really drive home what I said this week about motherhood being all ups and downs, today has definitely been on the ‘up’ end of the spectrum! I woke at 6.30am to the realisation that the twins had slept through for the first time! Then we braved a trip to the park and while there were tears at home time we had a lovely time - I forgot how much fun me and Bailey used to have when it was just us two! The twins slept the whole time, even while Bailey and I had lunch together - something I don’t think we’ve been able to do since before they were born! Then he had a nap without arguing and I got to drink a coffee while it was hot! There were tense moments, a few tears, a few muttered swear words. But it all felt easier to deal with today. More days like this please universe!
Dan is taking me to the theatre tomorrow as one of my Xmas presents, so this morning I thought ‘I’ll make my #fridayfeet a modern day Chicago theme and it will be EPIC! But then I realised three things:
Another Insta favourite thrifted! I reeeeally wanted this dress back in the Summer. As is normally the case, preloved ones were still quite pricey because it had been worn by a few big accounts. So I waited, and managed to pick one up just before Christmas! That’s not to say it can’t be made Winter appropriate though! BTW the use of hats this week is definitely more about the state of my hair than it is a fashion statement…
Wonder whether Dan bought me the @janespatisserie cookbook because he knew I wanted it, or because he was hoping I’d use it on the regular? Bit of both I reckon…
Today was absolutely one of the up and down I mentioned in my earlier post. A day of the twins refusing sleep and cluster feeding but peppered with moments of loveliness - a trip to a local market, cake, a walk in the sunshine, and a lovely meal cooked by someone else. Best of all, on the dog walk last this evening o spotted a tiny bit of daylight on the horizon, reminding me that Spring is on its way. A timely reminder that everything is temporary.
Before I had children I knew about Postpartum Depression. It still took me by surprise to realise that PPD is just one end of the spectrum. That the ‘Baby Blues’ that up to 80% of new mums experience is not merely a couple of days of high level hormones, but actually months and maybe more of existing on a sliding scale of extreme emotions. I thought I was prepared to feel some uncomfortable feelings, but I really didn’t understand just how erratic those feelings could be. That I could be soaring on cloud nine one minute and collapsed in a puddle of tears the next, with nothing but a bit of spilled milk as the trigger. That the change could come so quickly and so out of left field. And the rage. No one told me about the rage. I expected to cry. I expected to feel despair, boredom, frustration. But I never expected to feel blistering, intense anger, brought on with the flick of a switch. I never imagined that the sound of these little voices - that I love so, so much - all competing for attention at the same time could drive me to want to scream into the wind or punch holes in the wall. It doesn’t feel rational or sane. It feels like the furthest thing from normal. But it is just that - something the vast majority of us feel at some point. But I guarantee almost all of us have taken it as a sign we aren’t doing a good enough job or that we aren’t good parents. How sad is that? Be kind to yourselves, Mummas. I see you, and I feel you ❤️
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