I don’t know about you, but I always find the start of a new year quite refreshing. Unlike those who find the end of the festivities, the low bank balance and the drab, dreary weather a bit of a comedown, I actually enjoy the blank page (and I normally roll my eyes at people who say things that) that is New Year’s Day. The act of putting the previous 12 months to bed and focusing on making positive changes for the future is kind of cathartic, and I always wake up feeling hopeful and optimistic and ready to crack on with the year ahead. Oh, and hungover. I’m usually feeling hungover….!
It can be sad too. There have been many traumatic and upsetting events this year and it most definitely hasn’t turned out the way I’d hoped or expected. Looking back, I started the year with such optimism, despite the unexpected set of circumstances I’d found myself in. I’d just been through what, at the time, I thought had been the hardest year of my life so far, but I was determined to stay positive and focus on the good things, which is possibly why it felt like such a slap in the face when things came tumbling down again. It’s been tough, and at times has made me really question love, life and the universe. I hit what I now think was an all time low this year in terms of my self esteem and confidence and for a period I couldn’t imagine a light at the end of the tunnel, but in that funny way life goes, things did get better.
It wasn’t all bad, of course. The first six months of the year hold some very special memories for me. I got to go on some amazing trips and spent some time with some amazing people. And even after things started to unravel in the Summer I was reminded of what wonderful family and friends I am blessed with. Then towards the end things started to look up, and continue to do so, and now strangely I find myself pretty much exactly where I started – tentative but optimistic. Anxious about how much uncertainty there is in my life right now but excited about the potential good things still to come. And happy, the happiest I’ve felt in a fair while, and after the year I’ve had that isn’t something I take for granted.
And my plans for the coming months? Well, I’m not one for resolutions as I tend to fail miserably, but I definitely have some goals I want to achieve. I definitely want to pass my driving test this year. Driving is something I’m actually really scared of for reasons I’ve never been able to define, and I’ve been putting this off for years, but I took a big step in getting my provisional sorted and now I know I need to bite the bullet and get on with it, so wish me luck! I’m also doing the standard ‘New Year, New Me’ thing and making plans to get fit and healthy. You’ll definitely need to wish me luck with that one!! Finally though my main plan is to save like a muthaf***** and sort my life out. See, I’m kind of stuck in limbo right now. The savings goals I had were based on two people sharing a home, on my own though it will be a lot pricier and I’m not quite there yet. I also don’t really want to rush into buying a house while my life is still so up in the air, and I won’t be able to save a huge amount while renting on my own, so I’ve decided to power through for another couple of months, see where life takes me and reconsider when I hopefully have a little more cash to play with. So it’s back to not buying frivolous things, finally listing all those unwanted items on eBay and not being such a lazy cow and getting takeaways or Ubers to work on a regular basis! Sounds fun, huh?
And on that note, I’m going to leave it there before I talk myself out of it! Plus there is a 6am alarm call and a pre-work run with my name on it so I need to get my beauty sleep! I hope 2017 brings you all you’re hoping for, and if it doesn’t you can almost certainly read all about my failures here to cheer yourself up!
Onwards and upwards!